College is a time characterized by a lot of firsts. First time living away from home (unless you live at home and commute to school). First time showering in a community bathroom. First time taking the necessary steps to pursue your future career. And even first time living with someone who is not your sibling.
I have a little sister and we used to room together when we were younger, but I've never roomed with someone longer than a week. I understand living with a complete stranger can being extremely intimidating because number one, you don't know them as who they truly are as a person and number two, you don't know if you two or three will get along. Luckily, I was able to room with my friend from middle school, so I had a sense of peace rooming with a familiar face, but I was still nervous deep down because we went to completely different high schools and hadn't seen each other in four years. Four years is a LONG TIME!!! A person can change a lot in four years, whether it be for better or for worse. Again, I'm not bragging but I consider myself super lucky to have Tara as my roommate and she and I get a long very well. But for those of you who are anxiety-ridden with the anticipation of meeting your roommate during move-in day or have already found disparities with your roommate currently, here are some tips to help you conquer your fears or keep you from pulling your hairs out.
So without further ado...
1. Communication is key!
It is extremely important for you to speak with your potential or chosen roommate over the summer AND throughout the school year. Imagine not speaking a word to your roommate throughout the summer then moving into the room with them in August. You might as well share an apartment with a random person from the train station. Make sure you somehow come into contact with them as soon as possible, preferably over the summer. Plus, most schools probably have a Facebook group specifically for your freshman class, which will help you get to know your potential roomies and/or classmates a little better.
MAIN KEY: Contact your roommate/roommates the summer before school starts, so you guys can discuss who and what is being purchased/brought for the room.
MAIN KEY: Contact your roommate/roommates the summer before school starts, so you guys can discuss who and what is being purchased/brought for the room.
2. Set boundaries/rules
Personally, Tara and I don't really have strict rules for each other since we are pretty much similar in personality--organized and tidy (for the most part, not always though!). Besides keeping our personal belongings to ourselves, the only boundary or rule we have set for each other is not "scaring " each other while one is sleeping (she hid in her closet and scared me once so I plan on getting revenge in the near future). One thing I will say is that we are planning on establishing cleaning assignments--one person cleans the sink and mirror area with disinfectant wipes while one sweeps the floor--and we plan on alternating roles so one person is not stuck with the same job.
MAIN KEY: Establish boundaries for each other, whether that be cleaning wise or borrowing someone else's things (Tara usually asks before she uses something of mine and I do the same).
Personally, Tara and I don't really have strict rules for each other since we are pretty much similar in personality--organized and tidy (for the most part, not always though!). Besides keeping our personal belongings to ourselves, the only boundary or rule we have set for each other is not "scaring " each other while one is sleeping (she hid in her closet and scared me once so I plan on getting revenge in the near future). One thing I will say is that we are planning on establishing cleaning assignments--one person cleans the sink and mirror area with disinfectant wipes while one sweeps the floor--and we plan on alternating roles so one person is not stuck with the same job.
MAIN KEY: Establish boundaries for each other, whether that be cleaning wise or borrowing someone else's things (Tara usually asks before she uses something of mine and I do the same).
3. Be considerate of each other's routines
Tara and I both have 8 ams almost everyday, so we don't really struggle with our two routines colliding in the morning time. But, she tends to go to bed earlier than I do, so often I leave the dorm room to study and if I'm being honest, this can bother me a little bit--mainly because I am so used to studying all the time in my bedroom at home. Nonetheless, it is something I have learned to live with because I respect Tara and her need for optimal sleep and it really isn't that bad studying in our study room since it's quiet and distraction free.
MAIN KEY: Be willing to compromise your old schedule and be considerate of your roommate's/roommates' routine(s)
Tara and I both have 8 ams almost everyday, so we don't really struggle with our two routines colliding in the morning time. But, she tends to go to bed earlier than I do, so often I leave the dorm room to study and if I'm being honest, this can bother me a little bit--mainly because I am so used to studying all the time in my bedroom at home. Nonetheless, it is something I have learned to live with because I respect Tara and her need for optimal sleep and it really isn't that bad studying in our study room since it's quiet and distraction free.
MAIN KEY: Be willing to compromise your old schedule and be considerate of your roommate's/roommates' routine(s)
4. Spend time together outside of the dorm room
Let's face it! You and your roommate are going to spend probably most of your time in your dorm room, whether it be doing homework, chilling out, or sleeping. Eventually, you guys will grow bored with staying in your room. SO...leave it and go out & explore your campus or the city that surrounds your campus. Plus, most of the time your university will have fun events to do, especially during orientation week. TAKE advantage of those events by having fun with your roommate(s) and just enjoy each other's company where you guys are actually dressed and not lounging in PJs (even though chilling in PJs are nice for a lazy day)!
MAIN KEY: It's okay to leave your dorm room and engage in activities together that don't consist of asking what professor you are currently doing homework for or if the caf is open.
Let's face it! You and your roommate are going to spend probably most of your time in your dorm room, whether it be doing homework, chilling out, or sleeping. Eventually, you guys will grow bored with staying in your room. SO...leave it and go out & explore your campus or the city that surrounds your campus. Plus, most of the time your university will have fun events to do, especially during orientation week. TAKE advantage of those events by having fun with your roommate(s) and just enjoy each other's company where you guys are actually dressed and not lounging in PJs (even though chilling in PJs are nice for a lazy day)!
MAIN KEY: It's okay to leave your dorm room and engage in activities together that don't consist of asking what professor you are currently doing homework for or if the caf is open.
5. Give each other space
This is essential! There is one room and usually 2 or 3 of you, so personal space should still be given to each person. One way Tara and I have given each other space is by giving each other "quiet time"--basically time to ourselves where we can get work done or watch Netflix with minimal distractions. Of course, there are moments when one of us are "in the zone" and the other wants to talk to them briefly, but for the most part, this is the best way we have established our own "personal bubbles" besides having our own separate areas of the room.
MAIN KEY: Give each other space by either having "quiet time" or temporarily leaving the room while the other one is in there, so you each can spend time by yourselves.
This is essential! There is one room and usually 2 or 3 of you, so personal space should still be given to each person. One way Tara and I have given each other space is by giving each other "quiet time"--basically time to ourselves where we can get work done or watch Netflix with minimal distractions. Of course, there are moments when one of us are "in the zone" and the other wants to talk to them briefly, but for the most part, this is the best way we have established our own "personal bubbles" besides having our own separate areas of the room.
MAIN KEY: Give each other space by either having "quiet time" or temporarily leaving the room while the other one is in there, so you each can spend time by yourselves.
6. It's okay to have friends other than each other
In the beginning of the semester, Tara and I used to eat lunch and/or dinner together all the time because we were each other's closest friend at the moment. But as we made new friends, we have been eating lunch/dinner together less. And this is okay because you are now branching out and creating new friendships, which is really important in college. Tbh, Tara and I both felt a little guilty not spending as much time together like we used to, but we have made a compromise by trying to eat lunch or dinner at least once a week and ultimately, we were more happy than sad that we didn't spend as much time together because we realized that each of us were making friends outside of our little circle!
MAIN KEY: Don't worry too much about not spending the same amount of time with your roommate(s) as you did in the beginning of the semester, but make sure you still make time to hang out with each other at least once a week or every so often!
In the beginning of the semester, Tara and I used to eat lunch and/or dinner together all the time because we were each other's closest friend at the moment. But as we made new friends, we have been eating lunch/dinner together less. And this is okay because you are now branching out and creating new friendships, which is really important in college. Tbh, Tara and I both felt a little guilty not spending as much time together like we used to, but we have made a compromise by trying to eat lunch or dinner at least once a week and ultimately, we were more happy than sad that we didn't spend as much time together because we realized that each of us were making friends outside of our little circle!
MAIN KEY: Don't worry too much about not spending the same amount of time with your roommate(s) as you did in the beginning of the semester, but make sure you still make time to hang out with each other at least once a week or every so often!
Thank you guys for reading this post! I hope at least one of these tips you will take with you whether you are a high school senior about to embark on your new life as a college student or a current college student dealing with the adventures of having a roommate or roommates. If you have any additional tips for living with a roommate, comment them down below:)
Have a great week and don't forget to "stay classy!" 💜 See you next Sunday!:)
This is super interesting! I'm glad that your roommate situation has gone so well!
ReplyDeleteYay! I'm so glad you found this post interesting! And me too girl. I thank God for giving me a great roomie:)
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